Four roads out of worry town
/Hello my loves,
This week I’ve been sharing my life with a challenging companion: my busy mind. Because I share a lot of emotional content, it might be tempting to think that I have my own emotional state perfectly sorted. This simply isn’t true, and nor is it of anyone, ever. Even the most enlightened of people are still doing their own personal work – it’s why we all came here. And while I’ve certainly become a lot better at navigating what life brings me, there are times when I find this easier, and times when I find it harder. And this week, I’m finding it harder. Not in a terrible way, but I’ve just been noticing the chatter amp up in my mind, and I’m definitely not enamoured with what it’s had to say. Is this a disaster? No. Is it something to notice, reflect on and work through? Yes. So today I thought I’d share four of the tried and tested strategies I use to soothe myself through weeks like this.
The redecoration method
When I find myself hemmed in by catastrophising thoughts, I like to employ a practised attention shift, and gently move my focus to something that brings me joy (no prizes for guessing what that is for me!). I make a conscious choice to try and redecorate my mind, changing the angst-filled colour scheme to something tantalisingly delicious instead. When I’m deep in a well of worry, I unfurl a roll of rhubarb tart wallpaper, and hang it all over my cranial lounge-room. When I find myself mired in a myriad of eventualities that haven’t even happened, I get out the old roller and paint a new wall, covered with my latest concept for the ultimate scotch egg. You wouldn’t believe how much of my work has been brought into being by doing this.
The good news for those of us with busy-beaver minds is that we’re capable of incredible focus, which is actually a really good thing. We just need to shift our attention to something joyful and productive, and let loose over there, while giving worry-town as wide a berth as we can. And of course, it doesn’t have to be food! It can be anything that makes you happy, from painting to skiing to gardening to fencing to tightrope walking to orchid propogating. Find the place where the joy lives, and put your attention there.
The immersion method
Water can be incredibly cleansing. Whether it’s a bath or a shower, an ocean or a lake, getting yourself into whatever water is available can be exceptionally soothing in times of stress and worry. It sounds simple, but I’ve found it provides incredible respite. In cooler weather, I adore baths. I spike the steaming water with some deliciously fragrant oil, light a candle, dim the lights, put on some gentle music and slip right in. If you don’t have a bath, you could experiment with a lovely warm shower, or maybe even head to a bathhouse if there’s one in your area. In warmer weather, an ocean or river provides the ultimate cleanse. In the first weeks of opening Hearth & Soul, I’d head to the ocean on my days off, and just float there, feeling the power of something much greater than myself cradling and supporting me. It was beautiful, and provided the recalibration that I needed as I worked out how to best navigate the new life I’d created for myself.
The sit-on-your-ass method
Daily meditation is the single most powerful thing I’ve ever done. It’s shifted my entire emotional state, and the far-reaching implications it’s had into every aspect of my life cannot be overstated. I’m fully aware that the worse you feel, the harder it is to motivate yourself to meditate. But a little time sitting, breathing and connecting each morning is the ultimate gift to yourself, and there’s a myriad of resources out there to help you get started. When I worked in the corporate world, I used to escape to a quiet corner and use the Headspace app, and if you’re after something a little more spiritual, this two-minute meditation is one of my all-time faves.
The bird's eye view
When I cast my mind back over the decades of my life, I see both times of joy and times of challenge, some of them pretty extreme. I also see that neither are permanent states of being, and that I’ve learned a great deal from both. All our experiences are sent to help us grow and evolve. If we stop and reflect, we can all recall a few examples of events that felt awful at the time, but in the long run proved to actually be for the best. When your worries get stuck on a loop, it can be really helpful to zoom out on your life, and recall other times you’ve felt this way, and how in the end, whatever was happening for you was a doorway to your next chapter, not a roadblock to happiness. And then remember that the same is always true. Just because we can’t see the full picture, it doesn’t mean it’s not there.
And so my loves, on we sail. I’m heading into a late-winter weekend filled with lovely ladies’ lunches - what could be more divine than that? I hope your weekend is equally blissful 💛.
Love, Rachel xxx
